Allowing my children to pick their own clothes has given them a sense of personal self-expression, independence, confidence and pride. When they were younger and did need guidance, then it was about not limiting choices nor giving too many. To me it’s about putting an emphasis on how they feel rather than being on trend. To quote the Annie movie (clearly a pivotal movie in my life considering the name):

As parents, we need to let go of what we and other’s think and just let children be themselves.

I’m a bit of an A type personality so when I see my kids building a Lego house with a toilet in the dining room, I find myself squirming. Yes, similar occurs when decorating the Christmas tree. However, we give them the lower branches to do as they wish despite it usually resulting in 10 balls on one branch - eek! (I just eat double the pudding to make up for the not so meticulous tree.) Sometimes this means things aren't perfect in my opinion but it’s not always about my opinion- it’s about theirs!

I don't guess what my children have drawn. I find if I do, I’m nearly always wrong anyway. Instead I ask them, “Can you explain your drawing to me?” Allowing their self-expression to be centred. And I don’t just put emphasis on the outcome but also the process. Also, I put artwork on the walls that my adult-filtering-system may not have seen as their “best work” but it’s clear it meant something to them.

Times are certainly different and this doesn't mean “come home when the street lights turn on.” But allowing safe, (somewhat supervised) adult-free time gives space for our children to figure things out for themselves which in turn builds independence and confidence.